Drug Smugglers Are So Cutting Edge

The drug smuggling business is one that requires constant adaption and never ending creativity. Way way back in the day they used to fly below radar on small planes. They then modified this and would set up specific drop locations over the water and have speed boats pick up duffel bags full of weed, yayo and H-train. As the Federales and United States DEA officials began to get wise to these tactics it was back to the drawing board for cartels around the world...the task: How to smuggle drugs in the least likely, most indiscreet manner.

There is of course the impressive ecstasy trade that utilized hard cover children's books to store more than enough MDMA to get a rave going. This group, out of Amsterdam also utilized the "always Innocent" image of young Hasidic Jewish men...often considered the least likely drug mules on the planet.




Sticking with the drug mule method there are countless stories of cartels forcing people to swallow balloons across boarders and subsequently shit them out and sell them to distributors once in the desired location. That's' right...you may have done drugs that someone else shit out...lets hope those balloons were durable.




Not long ago there was the story that broke out of Mexico in which a Colombian cartel had fashioned their own cocaine stuffed submarine for crafty under water smuggling. Seems the Naval forces have radar that can detect that kind of shit.




Also crafty in their smuggling techniques are the local Italian deli's of New York City who were also using submarines, of the sandwich variety, to hide and distribute drugs. Meat Platters were also used...FYI.



There is also the situation from back in the Viet-Effing-Nam days when soldiers bodies were loaded with drugs and then shipped back to the U.S. both crafty and extremely immoral...however morals were never a factor in the "Drug Game Yo"


Most recently the cartels have attempted to stuff dead sharks with 870 packages of cocaine. They were of course caught...that's how we know this happened, a duh.



Other notable smuggling/stashing/distribution techniques that I have heard of are match books in Pizza Uno..yep that's a call out. Napkins, cell phones with batteries removed, jewelry cases, chap sticks and of course the good old fashion clenched butt cheeks.

Who knows what we will see next?